Hot 'N' Cold
by Nessie'sLaTuaCantante
Summary: lol read it


(A/N: lol i read this fanfic about Bella PMSing. So . . . I wanted to write one! But instead of Bella, it's gonna be moi! Hehehe!)

MyPOV

I was having one of those dreams where everything was out of place. You know where the grass is yellow? And your mom is married to your ex's dad? Yeah, it was one of those.

Well, in my dream, I was the vampire, and Edward was the human. He was _my_ singer. Don't woryy, it gets better- I was making out with Jasper. Jasper was wrapping his arms around me. Then he put his hand where my my bladder would've been if I were human. He dug his nails under my skin, and peeled it off. He pulled out all my vital organs. It hurt!!!

I woke with a scream, bolting upright. My breathing was staggered. I looked around for Edward. He was beside me, holding my quaking figure.

"What is it, love?" My eyes were wide with fear and pain.

The same pain I'd felt two minutes ago ripped through my lower torso. It felt like someone was carving my insides with a knife- slow and painful. Stab quickly, pulled it out slowly, as if to prolong the pain. I groaned.

"Audrey?" Edward's voice was thick with concern. He pressed his cold hand to my forehead.

"I'm cramping," I moaned. His face went from concerned to confused.

"Oh . . . "

"Hold on," I said, getting up slowly. I cramped slightly, so I bent over the slightest bit. I went to the bathtroom and did what girls do when I noticed that I was out of Midol.I went to my bedroom and found a very confused Edward.

I wrinkled my nose in displeasure. "I need Midol."

"What is Midol, love?"

"OMG! Just give me your phone. Please," I added softly. Whoops. I'm already PMSing. Oh, no. Edward handed me his cell obediently. I flipped the phone open, scrolled through the contacts till I found the one that I wanted. I preseed "send."

It rang once, then, "Hello?"

"Carlisle, it's Audrey."

"Oh. hello, Audrey. What can I do for you?"

"Are you working today?" I didn't want to sound rude, but I was really cramping.

"No."

"Can you please get me some Midol? I need it for cramping, fatigue, bloating, nausea, and headaches."

"Of course, dear. You'll have it soon."

We said our goodbyes, so I handed Edward the phone and smiled. I climbed into his lap -he was sitting in my rocking chair- and laid my head at the base of his neck.

"Are you, okay love?" His voice was low.

"Mmhmm. It's just my period. I'm warning you, though. I PMS like no other." I lifted my head to meet onyx eyes. My smile faded to a grimace.

"Mmm," he breathed.

"Will you hum my lullaby?"

"Of course," he murmured. He began to hum my lullaby. It soothed me to a daze. I don't know if I was asleep or awake.

About five minutes laster, Edward said, "Come in" so I assumed Carlisle was here. I straightened. I was very surprised when Rosalie danced through the door.

"Sorry about the cramps," she half grinned.

"And you said you wanted to be human," I teased while playfully rolling my eyes.

"Hmm. Well, I don't want _that_ part," she giggled.

"Can't have your cake and eat it, too."

She laughed. She walked towards us, and handed Edward my favorite medicine. She kissed Edward on the cheeck, then she kissed me on the cheek and danced out the door. The front door slammed shut- probably for my benefit.

I stared after her. What the hell? I'm not sure what expression was on my face when I turned to Edward, but he laughed at it.

"New Year's resolution," he chuckled.

"Ahh."

Edward opened the package, and pulled out the bottle. He twisted the lid and pulled off the silver seal, and looked at me. I held up two fingers. He placed two pills in my outstretched hand.

Edward stood, placed me on my butt in the chair, and was back before the door could hitch. He put a glass of water in front of me, and I swallowed my pills.

I looked at the clock. Noon. I was exausted. I'd been up a total of two hours and I needed a nap.

"I'm tired," I mumbled through a yawn. He arched one eyebrow. "I'm always tired when it's that time," I murmured, too tired to raise my voice any louder.

"He nodded in understanding, and picked me up and put me on my neon pink sheets. He tucked the blanket and wrapped his arms around me. I rolled over and snuggled into his chest. He bgan to hum my lullaby, and I soon dozed off.

{Was this alright? I just changed it to me instead of Bella. If Bella gets to be lucky, so do I. :) }


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